He Went to Hell, I Mean, Jared

Tis the season of diamond and car commercials.

I’m generally anti-marriage (for myself) but years ago decided that if someone even wanted to attempt proposing to me, a diamond ring wouldn’t be the way to go. Instead, I wanted a Jarrett custom rifle. What, you aren’t familiar with the old saying, “Weaponry is a girl’s best friend”?

Well, since deciding that, I’ve bought my own Jarrett custom rifle. So I don’t really need another one. (Yes, I know, when it comes to guns, I always need another one.)

As far as cars…I bought my dream vehicle several years ago and am still totally in love with it. I have yet to see a vehicle with a red bow on it that could even compete with my baby and its 5.7 Hemi V8.

So naturally I was thinking, “Man, what’s a guy to do? He wants to buy you something that is symbolic of his undying love for you, but you already have everything awesome! Is there no hope for your hordes of suitors?”

Fear not, guys, I thought of something. Something perfect for me that you won’t see in dozens of commercials.

A big, beautiful, glorious bathtub.



3 thoughts on “He Went to Hell, I Mean, Jared

  1. Maybe they aren’t the kind you want, but bathtubs are appearing in dozens of commercials–for a certain ED medication (which shall not be named because it would probably set off spam filters).

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