I don’t even want to be writing this post but whatever. I’m shallow. Yes, I spend my days in yoga pants and hoodies and I eat like a pig, but I still like to hear I’m attractive. It took me a long time to accept compliments because for a long stretch of time, I wasn’t cute at all and that was pretty obvious.
But now I’m kind of revisiting that. Not out of fishing for compliments or some insecurity relapse, but out of healthy skepticism. When someone you know tells someone they are cute when they definitely are not and that someone turns around and pays you a compliment, how can you believe it?
I pretty much live on the internet. Some people reading this have seen pictures of me, but most haven’t. To most people I’m just my avatar, which is the way I like it. But I’m always amazed when I see someone on Twitter with a homely av and the compliments flood in. Are people being nice? Rewarding the honesty of revealing oneself even if it means shattering that illusion of hotness? Are they hoping to score points somehow-any flirting is better than no flirting? Now, I’m not saying people should tweet, “OMG what were you thinking? I liked you better before I knew you were hideous.” But why say anything at all? Affirmative action compliments?
Just so you know, this has been on my mind for some time. I don’t want any of you reading into it, so vain you think this post is about you. 😉 It’s more just an accumulation of thoughts. Every now and then I think about doing away with my little Sunako avatar and coming out as myself. But I couldn’t stand the compliments, speculating which are real, if any.