Month: May 2009

Lesson 13: I am George Koizumi

Okay, I’m really not.  I’m not a guy, not handsome and I’m not bisexual with fantastic fashion sense.  I’d like to apologize in advance for the dramatic tone.  🙂

A while back, to see what the fuss was about, I read “Twilight.”  And thought I was going to vomit.  I like my vampires a little less high school and a little more Alucard.  My mom read the book and said, “I can see the appeal to older ladies.  It reminds you of the innocence of the first person you loved in high school.”

I know this is TMI, but there was nothing innocent about my “first love” in high school.   That is probably why when I first read “Paradise Kiss” I could relate to Yukari.  No, I wasn’t model material, but I was caught up in something fast and crazy and I wanted it to work but I knew it just wasn’t meant to be.  He was too controlling and I was too stubborn and our personalities were too destructive together.

But I realized yesterday that I’m not Yukari anymore.  I’m George.  I’m the narcissist, the selfish one…the one who pushes your boundaries until you stand up for yourself and make me mad because I don’t get my way or you give in and I don’t respect you because it was too easy.  You can’t win.  George as described as “not a man that will make a woman happy.”

I’m seriously thinking about getting a shirt made that simply says, “I will not make you happy.”

Lesson 12: Girls Are Crazy!

I finished watching “Shuffle!” last night and decided that the lesson from that anime is that girls are f-ing crazy.

This may not be an epiphany to many of you.  I’ve made this statement plenty of times in my life before watching “Shuffle!” and guys look at me, kinda puzzled, and say, “But you’re a girl.  Are you calling yourself crazy?”  I say, “Yes!  I am insane!”  But then, of course, you get into that whole catch-22 thing where if I was really insane, wouldn’t I say that I’m not crazy, because only sane people can realize they’re crazy and crazy people think they’re sane?

Anyway, at first I thought these girls were crazy because they all thought they were in love with Rin, who seemed nice enough but didn’t seem to have anything all that great about him that I could tell.  But then we went from just plain crazy to F-ING CRAZY.  Nerine apparently absorbed the personality/life essence of her clone Lycoris…who was in love with Rin before Nerine was.  Nerine gets her feeling sorted out and realizes she loves Rin herself and it’s not just Lycoris’ emotions coming through…then Sia ends up revealing her alter ego Kikyou and I just sat there thinking, “Do all these girls have multiple personalities?  Isn’t this played out?  Are all these girls completely nuts?”

But it gets better.  Kaede has a nervous breakdown where she’s yelling about how her reason for living is basically to cook and clean for Rin and do his laundry.  I don’t know a guy out there who’ll turn that down, but Rin leaves and Kaede loses it even more.

It was at this point in the plot that I realized there was more to the lesson than just “girls are crazy!”  There is a second half and that is: Guys are idiots.  Rin totally can’t understand why Kaede is going bananas and it’s quite a while before he realizes that he’s been taking her for granted all these years.  Rin is out with his new girlfriend while Kaede is at home cleaning and cooking meals Rin isn’t home to eat and making plans with him that he brushes off to go hang out with Asa…and he says to Kaede, “What’s wrong with you?”  Uh, hello!

My theory about the dual moral of “Shuffle!” was reinforced when Rin slits his wrist to force Asa to use her magic that is consuming her.  Watching that scene, I thought, “Yep.  Girls are crazy.  Guys are idiots.  Which is why they’re obviously meant for each other.”